Sometimes I find myself wondering if I have become more like the Pharisees than I would ever really care to admit. It seems like every time I read through the gospels and ask God to teach me something new, He shows me more and more ways my attitude reflects that of the religious leaders during Jesus day and how little I resemble the Messiah Himself. This bothers me, as it rightly should, and every time it happens, I am reminded that God has called us to follow His Son, to be “little Christs” and certainly not to be “little religious leaders”.

Whenever this realization dawns on me, my feelings are somewhat hurt. It would be far nicer to picture myself as anyone in the gospel narratives other than the Pharisees. I would far rather be one of the misguided and fool-hearty disciples like Peter, a sinner Jesus forgives, a crippled, blind or deaf man He heals or even one of the silent bystanders than to be lumped in a category with the “stiff necked” men who find their purpose in trying to outsmart Jesus to discredit Him (and later to kill him). Yet when I hold up an image of the Pharisees, I feel strangely like I’m looking in a mirror.

When I read John 8:2-11 recently, I felt like I had been kicked in the chest. Seeing my reflection in the Pharisees actions, I could not help but drop to me knees to seek forgiveness.

John 8:2-11

but early the next morning he was back again at the Temple. A crowd soon gathered, and he sat down and taught them. 3 As he was speaking, the teachers of religious law and the Pharisees brought a woman who had been caught in the act of adultery. They put her in front of the crowd.

 4 “Teacher,” they said to Jesus, “this woman was caught in the act of adultery. 5 The law of Moses says to stone her. What do you say?”

 6 They were trying to trap him into saying something they could use against him, but Jesus stooped down and wrote in the dust with his finger. 7 They kept demanding an answer, so he stood up again and said, “All right, but let the one who has never sinned throw the first stone!”8 Then he stooped down again and wrote in the dust.

 9 When the accusers heard this, they slipped away one by one, beginning with the oldest, until only Jesus was left in the middle of the crowd with the woman. 10 Then Jesus stood up again and said to the woman, “Where are your accusers? Didn’t even one of them condemn you?”

 11 “No, Lord,” she said.

   And Jesus said, “Neither do I. Go and sin no more.”

When people choose to do something, despite the fact they know it to be wrong, it angers me. To choose a course of action for the purpose of self gratification, no matter how badly it hurts others seems despicable to me. When I think of this, adultery is one of the first sins to come to my mind and yet Jesus was more than willing to openly extend forgiveness to this woman who was so clearly guilty.

He then turns the entire situation around into what is perhaps one of the only times we see the Pharisees really hear Him. “All right, but let the one who has never sinned throw the first stone!” says He and instead of their typical furious and vindictive retreat, we see them slink away under the heavy shame of their actions and attitudes, without a single stone being thrown. After reading this, I understand exactly how they must have felt.

How many times have I looked down on somebody or written them off because they were overly promiscuous? How often have I directed insults their way and put forth a “valiant” effort not to be seen with them? I could ask myself these same questions about my interactions with any other “sinners”, anyone from liars all the way to drug lords, and I imagine many others in the church could as well. We must remember our sin has been forgiven, not because we merit it but because God is way nicer to us than we deserve.

Often times these actions stem from a real desire for holiness that has been twisted. However, holiness always starts with love and forgiveness. Genuine love for God and others results in willingness to forgive and therefore in a purity of actions. This is what enables Christ to see the woman not as a potential sexual partner, nor as a blight that needs exterminated but as a lost soul in need of mercy.

I think the reason Jesus, His disciples, and those who truly follow in their footsteps are able to be around whores, drunkards, thieves, murders, liars etc. Without the crippling fear of being corrupted is because their focus is on telling lost and hurting people about God’s forgiveness and new life, not about maintaining a good public image. The fact that many of us are so afraid of being corrupted by the sin of others points to the uncomfortable reality that we are still quite selfish in our hearts and we do not believe God can keep us from temptation.

After all of this, I have no choice but to make a life resolution not to act like a Pharisee but to follow Christ in the example He set.